I should or should I?

Sometimes when I see poor people begging, I find myself in a dilemma. Whether to give them money or not! Everytime this happens to me. I feel sorry for them but never have I been able to come to a conclusion. In fact, it also happens when I see poor, old people working. So many times, it brings tears to my eyes but these are some of the things, I have not been able to make an opinion about. Why does a person beg? Either he does not want to do hard work or does not have an opportunity to do any work. Then what do you do. Give him few coins, and that's it! What difference would that make to his life. The poor, little kid, who keeps asking you for money because he has not eaten anything for days or all his siblings begging around......all of them.....what future do they have? Here I think about my future and my career; and how whatever I have is not enough. I think about what do I want to do in my life. I have choice. They have none. Even survival is a big question mark for them.
Then there is another thing--pity. I pity those people who have to do hard manual labour for living. I don't know whether I should pity them. Is hard work, worthy of sympathy or it is like any other work? What is wrong with hard work? Why my heart sinks when I see a labourer pushing a cart full of load? I don't know. I really have no answer!

Going back in time

Today I was going through my old posts. It was a great experience. Truly. It brought back all those memories back, the exhiliration of being placed in my dream company, the phase of aimlessness,the joys of reading, and lots more. I marvelled at my own written words! I wonder why have I not written any poem for so long! By the way, now my plan is to get into the arena of short stores. Let's see when and how I start.
Just now I was also thinking about my new hair cut. I am also planning for streaking my hair. Now how's that related? Well, new things! Perhaps that is what I need to do. Perhaps, after a point life gets monotonous and you just need to incorporate new things or changes to breathe a new lease of life into your daily life! If we go on doing the same things, we would get the same results. Heard that before?

Another day from the book of Life

All these months, while I was working and acting very busy, I have missed blogging terribly. I always think, life at Mumbai is too exhaustive. You don’t have time to think of anything else but work. And that can create emptiness inside you. My problem, perhaps is that I think too much about things which I should not, and too superficially about things, which I should. I like to believe that I love reading and writing. But I have no time! Or rather, I am lazy, too lazy to take time out from my “busy” days. But now I have decided (one of those resolutions!!!) to make the most of my time and days.
Today I saw “Water” by Deepa Mehta. I would say I am plain lucky to have been at the place where it was being screened. And somehow I decided to join the people watching it. I knew they were screening Water but I did not know it was that controversial movie. I liked the movie over all but critically speaking the actings of John Abraham and Lisa Ray left a little more room for improvement. But atleast here, John acts! I had found Lisa good in Kasoor, but of course Divya Dutta dubbed for her. I n Water, especially, when Lisa Ray comes to know about the name of John’s father. I thought, that particular moment demanded more to be spoken in terms of expressions and body language! Or, how should I put it, this scene needed a little more weight. Because it was a crucial moment in the story. Also, I did not particularly like the way John reacted when he came to know that Lisa had committed suicide. I thought it seemed that Lisa had just gone out of town rather than out of this world. But undoubtedly, Seema Biswas and the little girl were brilliant. All said and done, I think Deepa Mehta’s effort is laudable. And more than that she deserves a salute for her determination to make this movie. "Water" evoked in me a thirst to know more about the plight of those women in the past. I remember, I read in India today (or was it Outlook?) that in Vrindavan, there are still such ashrams where widows stay together. They pass their days raying and do not have any money on them for their sustenance. They are required to live a life of giving up everything in the name od widowhood. Today, in this world, this whole idea seems ludicrous, but in those days, this was the reality for any widow. I am glad I was not born yesterday....I mean in those days. May be I was, in some other body, in some other form!
Right now I am reading Collected stories Part-2 by Shashi Deshpande and May you be the mother of a Hundred Sons by Elisabeth Bumiller. After reading 4 books by Shashi Deshpande and hundreds by other authors, I have reached a conclusion today-- I love this author. Or rather I would say, I idolise her. If I ever became a writer, I would like to write like her. Her stories are actually not stories. Not in the typical way. It does not necessarily have a typical beginnng and the cliched ending, but it tells you a story. A very different kind of story. It would tell you about complexities of characters, of life being grey, of plethora of emotions, stories held in moments, hours or a few days. The books which I am going to read next are Ice-Candy-Man by Bapsi Sidhwa and Mediocre but Arrogant by Abhijit Bhaduri.