Why I Decide To Quit?

… my job, that is. It is a question I often get asked, explicitly or implicitly. I have addressed it many times in different places in different ways.

Let us just begin with the fact that it is easy to get stereotyped in this world. No offence. I have also been guilty of judging other people on perceptions.

So, here’s the story of a Stay-at-home-Mom [a.k.a me] who did not quit her job because she was about to have a baby; but one way or the other that’s what eventually happened.

Please click here to read the complete post. 

The Updates from yesterday [UBC Post 9]

Image courtesy: makeupandbeauty.com

We have started implementing the plans we made yesterday.

To begin with, today I managed 200 jumps (I don't know what else it is called) in rope skipping. I am at ease with skipping so I can easily reach 500 reps in a few days. I also need to incorporate half an hour of brisk walking or jogging soon.

Morning, when I was about to start my breakfast, one of my friends called up. She asked me what I was doing. I said I was about to savour my breakfast – poha and tea. She said, 'OK, then forget it'. I insisted, ‘no, tell me’. She said, ‘I was thinking if you would be interested in GM diet.’ She was basically looking for a partner to begin this difficult dieting program, for motivation. I am very clear, I will never do dieting. That’s just not me. We usually don’t eat much junk food. I don’t think food is that much an issue with me because I eat enough veggies and not more than 2 chapatis at one time. I realize that once I get regular with exercises like walking / jogging / skipping / yoga, I will nail it. I am not losing my sleep on it. Few kgs here and there is alright. What is a perfect body anyways? Are we ever happy with what we have? 

Image courtesy: bolsboardgames.com

We also played Scrabble today after putting the little one to sleep, like old days. But of course, then we used to play for hours, now we stick to a time. Whoever has the higher score by then, wins. The strange thing is that though I know more words, my husband always wins. The thing is he is able to think up a lot of big or multiple words. He even takes a lot of risks by framing weird words, which in his case mostly turn out to be actual words!

At Random [UBC Post 8]

In absence of any one particular subject to write about, I would write a random post today. And I love random posts because those are the most interesting ones. You don’t have to bother about the topic or the flow, just write what’s going on in your life and on your mind.

Here it goes:

• I finally finished ‘the Greatest Show on Earth’. Though it took me a while to finish it, I had a good time. It has also sparked my interest in this genre. A little bit of research led me to this book called ‘Stars from Another Sky’ by Saadat Hasan Manto. Next on my Wishlist. 
• That brings me to the books I ordered yesterday from Flipkart. I had a gift voucher of Rs 794. So, by just paying Rs 4 (since the order total was Rs 798), I ordered following books:
• Jaane Bhi Do Yaaro by Jai Arjun Singh (part of my newly-discovered love for film literature)
• The Missing Queen by Samhita Arni (This has been on my list for a long time now)
• Selective Memory: Stories from My Life by Shobhaa De (I ordered this one purely for its sensationalism) 
• My little one is about to be 2 by the end of this month. No matter how clichéd it may sound, I don’t know where the months went by. Sometimes I have this surreal realization when I look at him ‘from where did this little man turned up in our lives and turned it upside down’ J 
• The little one’s Dadaji-Dadi (paternal grandparents) and Bhaiya (cousin brother) were visiting. He would tail atleast one of them all the time, mostly his brother. It was difficult to maintain his schedule since he wouldn’t easily go for sleeping, when he would be having so much fun playing with big brother! However, I managed. I am a strict mother that ways. One of the days, his grandpa was going out for some work and as usual he wanted to tag along. His grandmother told him that “Dadaji bhow bhow (dog) ki pitti karne ja rahe hain (showing him slapping gesture)” translated to grandpa was going for beating up the dog. After that he himself started saying the same thing whenever he would not find any person at home. He would say ‘Dadaji bhow bhow (then show slapping gesture)”. Now, they have gone back to Delhi. So, whenever somebody asks the little one where is your Dadaji/ Dadi / Bhaiya. He would say “Dadaji / Dadi / Bhaiya bhow bhow (slapping gesture)”. Many times he would say it without even asking, as if to sonsole himself. Poor thing! It is so heart-rendering to watch little kids cope with such kind of situation.
• He is unable to pronounce his own name yet, so he calls himself baby. So, if it is sleeping time and you ask him who is going to do neenna (sleep)? He would say “baby”.
• I have a diary where I try to write every once in a while about his development and feelings etc. I have kept space for pasting relevant pictures also, but haven’t really progressed on that front. I have seen many mommy bloggers who have chronicled their baby’s development diligently. I am always skeptical of posting his pictures on the internet. [Read my article on similar lines here] I am tempted a lot of times because it is so much easier to put everything on a blog, especially when you want to do cross-linking, uploading pictures and videos. I know, I can have a private blog, but I just thought writing it in my own handwriting will be special. But it is getting difficult day by day. I also have a folder in which I put souvenirs like museum tickets, first rakhi, letter from grandmother, messages from grandparents, uncles and aunts on his first birthday, etc.
• When I wasn’t a mother, I had never given a thought to how would I raise my child, whether I would be working or would turn a Stay-at-Home mom. But one thing led to another and to cut the long story short, the moment I discovered I was pregnant, I wasn’t working. So, I just thought to take a break. And now I feel it has been one of the best decisions of my life. If you are interested, you may read my post on why I decided to quit. When I am with my son the whole day, there are several little moments with him which are extremely special – just being there next to him when he wakes from afternoon nap, walking him around when he wakes up if he wants, many little kisses and hugs, when we just start running around the house with the sound of his laughter filling my ears and my heart….there are many moments which I cannot even explain!
• How many of you feel that motherhood can get lonely sometimes? Especially if you are a Stay-at-home mom. You don’t get a break which you do when you go to office. Of course, I would not like to change a thing about my current situation but many times I miss meeting people, getting a break from following baby’s schedule. It gets lonely sometimes because in weekdays hubby can be around only for a few hours. Of course, he tells me to go out during weekends but I am lonely with lazy. Deadly combination I tell you!
• I had a heart-to-heart with hubby today. We discussed about making time everyday for the two of us. In being parents, we are forgetting about each other. May be not forgetting, but iit gets pushed down the priority list. It is going to be tough because I have about 4-5 hours in the whole day when I need to read, write (blog), read on internet, respond to my mails (though few), and now we want to do something like play some games or generally talk about the day, have tea / coffee, etc. It is not uncommon to see people hooked to their computer / mobile / TV screens in their free time. And I am not talking about only my household. I want to change that. I cannot let technology rule my life.
• I want to lose 4 kgs. I wanted to do that before my birthday but that has already gone 2 and half months back (1^st May). So, now I am targeting my son’s birthday which isn’t too far either. I cannot do dieting. I usually don’t eat junk food on daily basis so what remains to be done is some physical activity. I am planning to re-start walking / jogging from tomorrow (the elusive tomorrow), skipping (I love skipping and I can do that easily) and crunches – one by one. I just hope I accomplish even one fourth of what I plan. That much will be enough.

Before signing off, I want you to guess my age. I hope I haven’t mentioned that already and needless to say I want to hear a number younger than what my age actually is. Don’t be mean J 

May Photo A Day : Day 27: Can't Live Without

Them. Those two people in the picture. One, is not related to me by blood. The other, I haven't known even for 2 years. And yet, life is incomplete without them. Can't live without my husband and my son.

The picturesque place, in the photo, is the private beach of Blue Ocean Resort and Spa,Ganpatipule. If you have not been to Ganpatipule, highly recommended for the super clean beach.

May Photo A Day : Day 25: Us

From friends to best friends, from batchmates to soulmates, from life-partners to co-parents...we have come a long way. This is Us. Though we have a bundle of joy in our lives now but 'us' still means him and me.

I still remember the day, I really met him for the first time: 14th August 2003. First year of our MBA, within first few days of joining. A bunch of us became close friends, exploring the city in our new found freedom. Somewhere two of us became best friends. Our friendship was that space where I was free to be myself, without being judged for any emotion. I used to pass notes to him on tissue papers while eating out with friends. People around us assumed what we learnt later, that we were in love - he realized first, I discovered later.

He promised me the day we committed to each other that he would take care of me. That day and this day, he hasn't forgotten his promise. He has held me in every failure, in every success, in every disappointment, in every joy. 

I have thanked God, at every single opportunity for blessing me with such a life partner because believe me, it is destiny. 

To Us!

Note: This picture is from our trip to Kashid beach near Pune in October 2012

May Photo A Day : Day 14: Need

I need Faith, that eventually everything will fall into place and everything will be alright.

This picture is from Diwali 2011. I think with the lamp in focus and the clay idols of Laxmi and Ganesh in the background, this picture depicted faith on the higher power. 

I am not a religious person but when I am stuck in a really difficult situation, I always believe in a higher power above who will take care of me. 

May Photo A Day : Day 4 : In My Cup

I am a hardcore tea drinker. And like all other tea drinkers, I have a fetish for fancy mugs too. 

Presenting, my kind of perfect tea (notice the colour) in an interesting mug (a souvenir from my first job at FCB Ulka, Mumbai). The mug says "Advertising is the most fun you can have with your clothes on".

This post is also nostalgic for me because my first job was in Mumbai, exactly 8 years back. And I am visiting Mumbai right now, from where I am posting.

Note: Somebody please teach me to watermark my pictures in Paint / Picture Manager

May Photo A Day : Day 2 : Morning Ritual

I am a big one on celebrity gossip. I read it first, the main news later. I know, not a very diplomatic answer. But that's me :-)

Since I am in Mumbai at the moment and since I am a big one on Celebrity gossip. This is part of my Morning Ritual.

May Photo A Day : Day 1 : I Bought This

Inspired by two women - Shilpa and Smita - who I look upto as bloggers, here I am, taking the May Photo A Day: A challenge that will change your life. So, basically, I, who hardly manages 3-4 posts a month, is gearing up for posting everyday this month.

It is my birthday today :-)

What better day to take up such an exciting challenge! After all, it is supposed to change my life!

Here’s my picture from my birthday. 






I am wearing this pink jacket by Quirkbox, bought from InOnIt just 2 days back. I love its quirky design and the fact that it is a beautiful accessory to wear on kurtas and T-shirts. 

Why I decided to Quit?

My job, that is. Although it has been over 2 years, since I quit my job but I never really talked about it.

We were a DINK couple. DINK is Double Income No Kids, to the uninitiated. We would go to work on the week days, catch movies on TV at night (we even watched 25 movies in a month through BigFlix), go mall-hopping or window-shopping on weekends, play games on PlayStation the whole night (my husband) or read the whole day (me) or watch back-to-back FRIENDS (me) or catch back-to-back movies in the theatre (us)…phew! Where was I?

But one fine day I realised (since I am an introspecting kind); I was fast approaching the dreaded figure of 30. I suddenly thought ‘what am I doing!’ After 20 years, will I look back and feel I had a great life or will I feel the pangs of unfulfilled dreams?

I will take a moment to give a background about my work. I have done Diploma in Marketing. I was obsessed with getting into Advertising, and I have written in detail here, here, and here, how I got the job I wanted, during my campus. But my delusions about Advertising ended pretty soon. It may have something to do with my then boyfriend, now husband, not being around in Mumbai, where I worked. I knew no one in Mumbai and it got pretty lonely because I am not an out-and-about girl. I hardly went out during those days. So, after about 15 months, I moved to Pune in a Marketing Communication profile. Though I knew nothing about what to expect, I learnt a lot during my 4.5 years stint. It was refreshing and exciting to be taken seriously and approached for Marketing advice when you have so less experience. I learnt on the job and had a great time, but it was not my calling. Writing is.

So, somewhere around early 2010, we decided that I can put in my papers. We streamlined our financial commitments, as we were going from double income to single income. Friends still tell me how they would not have given up such salary. But you know, money is not the most important thing in my life. In the last 2 years, I have never, not even for a single second, regretted giving up my job. My husband is a person like no other. He has been the most supportive husband ever. There are not enough words to articulate his role in my life. And I must also add that although I married him after knowing him for 4 years, nobody can really predict how a person will eventually be as a husband. Once I was unwell during my stint in Mumbai. I was all alone. He is the one who caught a bus for Mumbai after office at night (when he was a fresher), waited for the locals to start in the morning in Mumbai, reached my hostel at 5 am, picked me up and brought me with him to Pune, and went back to office at 10 am (as a Fresher he could not take leave). He is the one on whose shoulder I cried when I did not do well in a subject. He is the one who waited for 3 hours (till 3 am) outside my creative agency, when I had to put a catalogue to print. He is the one who held my hand when I went into labour. He is the one who complements me every single day for the tea I make for him.

Oh, but I digress, I would write more about him some day. So, I put in my papers before Diwali holiday in 2010 (October). My boss was bewildered, slowly when others came to know, they either thought I was pregnant or I was joining another company. Neither was true. My boss reasoned out with me that taking a break looks attractive before you do it but when you actually end up not doing anything, you end up in frustration. He was kind enough to even consider giving me a break for a couple of months. But I told him the truth. I did not know if I would want to join back after the break. My mind was somewhere else and I did not want to keep the company in limbo. So, he accepted my resignation. He expressed his surprise couple of months back that I am still jobless and still very content in my role.

I had certain things to achieve ‘before I turned 30’. Being a mother was one of them. We discovered that I was pregnant during our Anniversary in early December 2010. I went on to complete my notice period till 31^st December 2010.

The earlier plan was to quit, and discover Pune. Just walk around, go to all the bookstores, quaint little places for food and clothes, and just do what an office-going person seldom does, while away my time. For some time. But I had severe nausea from the beginning of my pregnancy, which continued almost throughout the 9 months. I was thankful that I did not have to rush to office, figure out my diet and take rest. I took care of myself (of course with complete support of my husband, who cooked for me many times) for the entire 9 months. My in-laws came in the 9^th month.

Naturally, my focus had shifted. I hardly read or thought about writing during those months. I just focused on my pregnancy. After delivery, my life had been on a whirlwind (as all new parents would know). In only last couple of months, I have started writing in a disciplined way, and reading with a lot of focus. This year I am going to read the highest number of books I have ever read in any year. Because when my son would start playschool (most probably, in December 2013), I would start actively seeking writing opportunities. Right now, I am taking in whatever is coming on its own. I hardly get much time. I get on an average 3 hours of reading and writing daily. That too because I don’t do anything else. I don’t socialise. I don’t gossip on phone. I don’t watch TV.

In last 2.5 years, my life has changed so much. I never realised it would turn out this way when I decided to quit. But I am in a happy space. I live with the two people I love the most. I have all the time for them. I read a lot and I have started writing professionally. What more can I ask for!