Monday, July 20, 2009

Looking the Part

Yesterday had an argument with my dearest mother. On what? Well, my mother thinks I have really not learnt anything from her. Why this judgement? Simply because despite being married, I do not wear either Mangal sutra or Bindi or Bangles or toe-rings, whatever! Even the sindoor I wear is just not enough. It is hardly visible. My mother is a firm believer of ‘looking’ the part. In fact, I don’t even know why I started putting onSindoor. I like red actually, it brightens up anything. So, I started putting sindoor because it added colour to my face.

She thinks I’m trying to act oh-so modern. But I don’t really believe in ‘wearing’ marriage on my sleeve. To me, marriage is not so superficial.

Mum tries to reason with me saying that wearing all these is an expression on celebration of marriage. But I am definitely not buying it!

Marriage to me is extremely liberating. It means that you acknowledge the presence of someone special in your life and you want to spend the rest of your life with him. It does not mean you are somebody’s property now, it means when you go ahead and realize your dreams, there is someone who would be there behind you to support you, to share your joys and show you the right path.

With due respect to all the people from mum’s generation, I think they are too stuck up on these inconsequential details and lose the real essence. Marriage is really not the devil that it is made out to be, you just need to meet the right person ;)


  1. you are right!! marriage is to share your life with the one you love... that means you are not their servant! wearing sindoor and mangal sutra is just for a tradition to show that we are married!

    And thanks for dropping your comments in my blog!

  2. If wearing mangalsutra, sindoor n all is a sign of celebration of marriage then y not men too be made to wear something of that sort.

  3. I don't know who started this tradition, and the logic! Nobody even remembers. What I understand is, the points were nose pin or earrings are worn, were in accupuncture points to control anger, same thing is for sindoor on the middle parting. These were to make women be docile, control anger, etc. Really don't know, that's what I speculate.

  4. Hey Shas, the point is that those are not. I think acring for each other, creating happy moments together, is more of a sign of good marriage, not these superficial things.

  5. I think it should not be a each his own

  6. Hello!

    I must say I find it cute when newly wed brides wear those white and red chuudaa and flaunt a mangalsutra even on jeans. Its a brand new identity! However, it freaks me out when I see some dames putting a thick, fat column of sindoor on their heads. Downright scary...

    Esch one to his own. I guess when guys aren't forced to wear any sign of matrimony, then there shud b no such compulsion for women either. GO ahead and do your own thing, lady. I'll bail you out ;-)